
<p>STOP THE PRESSES!!! ; BREAK INTO THE PRIME-TIME TELEVISION PROGRAMING!! ; ;</p>



<p>The Mars Candy Company has announced the addition of a new candy-of-color in the M&;M line-up – Purple. It has been more than ten years since a new color has been added to the hitherto six-color family of chocolate treats.</p>



<p>Before I go any further, I must confess that in my pre-diabetic days, M&;Ms were among my favorite candies. ; I loved those little perfectly shaped crunchy candy-encased chocolates that melted in your mouth and not in your hands. ; They are a chocolate that you can keep in your pocket without having it return to a mushy mass. ; However, in all those years of devouring all those multi-color candies, I have never received any kind of message from them. ; ;</p>



<p>According to the folks at Mars, Purple is not just another piece of candy. ; In this day of political correctness, identity politics, and tribalism, being a piece of candy is not enough. ; You need social relevancy – a least some mock social relevance that would best be left to satire. ; In fact, the news from Mars (the company, not the planet – although that might have been a better explanation) reads more like an article from <em>The Onion</em> or <em>Babylon Bee</em> than a serious commercial enterprise.</p>



<p>According to Mars, Purple is one of the Company’s “spokescandies.” ; She …..</p>



<p>(Oh yeah. ; The information refers to Purple as a “she”.  ; It is not clear if Purple is a natural “she” or is a “he” candy that self-identifies as a “she” candy. ; In fact, I have no idea how the gender of a tiny piece of candy-covered chocolate is determined. ; But I digress.) ; ;</p>



<p>According to the folks at Mars, Purple is charming and has a “quirky nature.” ; Her color represents acceptance and inclusivity. ; Her character is one of “self-confidence, authenticity, and confidence.”</p>



<p>Jane Hwang, global vice president of Mars said, &#8220;There is so much about our new spokescandy that people can relate to and appreciate, including her willingness to embrace her true self – our new character reminds us to celebrate what makes us unique.&#8221; ;</p>



<p>I am sure that is what all those ten-year-olds will be thinking as they crush Purple between their teeth and send her shattered and emulsified (albeit charming) remains down their gullet. ; Ironically, Purple is really not new to the M&;M lineup. ; It was one of the first five colors introduced by Forrest Mars in 1941, when the candy had colors, but not personalities – and certainly not social relevancy. ; In 1949, Purple got replaced by “tan.” ; In 1995, Mars allowed consumers to pick a replacement for tan – and the choices were pink, blue, or &#8230; purple. ; They picked blue.</p>



<p>Purple even has her own original song – “I’m just gonna be me.” ; There are, however, two “me’s.“ Sometimes she is that classic M&;M, but sometimes she is a nut.</p>



<p>Of course, Purple is not the first M&;M with a message. ; They are all now designated spokescandies – although the messages are not very clear in some cases. ; Green had a makeover after appearing to be too sexy for a piece of candy. ; I missed that scandal.</p>



<p>I worry about a future generation that will be relying on a piece of candy for emotional counseling – and I have no intention of being lectured to by a bite of sugar-coated chocolate. ; After all … it is just a piece of candy.</p>



<p>So, there ’tis.</p>

ITS JUST CANDY for god’s sake!!
