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Scientific Analysis of a Liberal Brain

Scientific Analysis of a Liberal Brain

Brain structure and function of two dozen randomly selected adult liberals of various ages, and both genders were studied over a period of one week and compared to a standardized normal brain of similar number of adult conservative Americans across 35 states. It was found that the average liberal brain has a very limited capacity for intelligent thought and is prone to delusional psychosis.  

Introduction

It’s long been speculated that liberals do not have an actual brain and their entire performance as humans comes from a mass of diseased tissues that don’t grow and modify like normal brain tissues in healthy adults. We tested this hypothesis by studying the brains of 24 randomly selected adult liberal brains for structure and function and compared with standard brain characteristics for 10 key features. The comparison gives us an idea of what goes wrong in an average liberal brain and helps us assess whether there is hope for fixing the vulnerabilities associated with its defective features.

Methodology 

The brains were taken out of the heads of the participating subjects without affecting the function of the brain-owner and the brains in any significant way. The individual brains were then connected to sensors capable of a range of measurements. The sensors were calibrated and set to measure 10 key features of standard and healthy human brain responses including: perception, emotion, rationality, thinking, memory, motivation, affection, coherence, adaptability, and resilience. The measurements were plotted as a graph against the standard key features of a healthy non-liberal brain, and the differences were expressed in percentages.

Observations

The average liberal brain was found to be significantly different from a healthy non-liberal brain on all measurements of the 10 key features. It had a highly distorted perception of signals that define reality but was very low on rationality (reason), affection (love and care), and coherence. 

On features of memory, motivation, and emotion, it tended to be very selective. In nearly all cases, it did not respond well to signals from its own memory bank, showed very little to no motivation to stimuli of work and learning situations, and had a difficult time adapting to signals different than the initial set. But it exhibited high emotional responses to a select set of signals of certain key concepts – like white, Christian, conservative, masculine etc. – indicating strong negative memory of these signals. Parts of the brain involved in destructive planning appeared highly charged when in its emotionally responsive state.

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17 Comments

  1. Dr.dan

    We hope you sanitized the calverium before replacing the scalp. In many liberals, without sanitation, they have a preponderance to move to the streets of San Francisco

    Reply
  2. rick

    Ernest Dempsey, You hit a home run brother! Liberals are a danger to themselves. And, because of their Non-healthy brain tissue and totally irrational emotional thought, they (if allowed) will be the ruin of us all like is happening now. They should not be allowed anywhere near a place of power or authority. There is nothing more dangerous than a liberal especially a liberal that is more than 40 years old and has not yet realized how terrible liberalism is, and gotten help for their disorder. Some liberals have an awakening moment and make the changes themselves to become conservative. Something corrects inside their brain. But, sadly, some liberals go to their death in their original sad state of affairs. Those are the incurable ones you really have to worry about. Think Bernie Sanders and any liberal really.

    Reply
  3. frank stetson

    Another scintillating piece from the Dempsey Dumpster. My, it’s a large dumpster.
    Never hear this one before.
    Don’t quit your day job.

    I thought, what does science really say that Dempsey couldn’t.

    The liberal response:
    We wanted to respond with our view of the conservative brain, but we can’t find one (ba dum bump). We then though we could use a Indy that leans rights, far right, but turns out that’s only half a brain…..still not enough to test.

    So we went to PEW research who scientifically, via statistic survey and analysis told us conservatives, brains and all, are basically WHITE, very WHITE, non-college older men, a lot of Gen X-ers, from the rural South (or places that look like it), attend church once a week, and make less money. Sadly, they prefer larger houses on bigger lots. The key here is whites only and a very tight demographic based on that attribute.

    PEW told us liberals are diversified in race, religion (including unaffiliated), and gender, but are often college-educated men, women, and other from the urban Northeast who make more money but live in diversified housing from apartments to mansions. The key here is diversified in almost every attribute with better results for education and salary.

    Small tent, big tent. Guess which tent pays more? At some point one has to wonder, do you want to be part of a party of one type or, based on your talents, be part of, and compete on an equal basis with —- a much broader world.

    https://www.pewresearch.org/politics/2020/06/02/in-changing-u-s-electorate-race-and-education-remain-stark-dividing-lines/

    https://www.pewresearch.org/politics/2021/11/09/demographics-and-lifestyle-differences-among-typology-groups/

    Reply
    • Joe Gilbertson

      So you are convinced that white peoples brains are white and black people’s brains are black? I guess Asian brains would be yellow, right?

      Reply
      • Frank stetson

        I never said anything of the sort so sorry if that was your takeaway.

        I am pretty sure all healthy brains are pinkish grey in color, all races, creeds, etc.

        PEW was talking about conservatives and liberals, brains and all, really just like Dempsey. Sorry you missed the message, the link was there.

        Frankly, in this case, I actually find averages to be pretty meaningless, somewhat humorous. I guess not funny to you. Sorry.

        Reply
    • KawikaFiveSix

      Leftists are AFRAID of the TRUTH being told and of any competition for hearts and minds!
      Did you ever notice, no matter how stupid, crazy, how racist, or anti-Life, anti-American, anti-science, anti-Christian, anti-freedom, or anti-children, the Leftists all jump in line to accept the latest emanations of insanity that is now disseminated as “Truth” and “Science” amongst them?
      They can find “racism” where no “racism” could possibly exist, such as: access to the Outdoors, *Math, Geology, Grades, Weather, Science itself, complementing someone, Apple Pie, and now, “Y’all” and “Howdy”, but find no racism at all, from anything coming from the Left, no matter how obviously RACIST it is!

      *MATH
      Math is no longer an EXACT Science… depending on your race!
      What is 10 times 5?
      ANSWER (A.) 32, (B.) 79, (C.) 61, (D.) 109, (E.) All of the above.
      Accordingly, POC can just pick ANY number, or they can choose their own – they believe that any number you choose are all CORRECT!

      “The whole movement designed to compensate for the fact that blacks were behind”—and says that “blacks today have worse indices compared to whites in education, income levels…”
      Thereby putting POC even farther behind in education and job opportunities.

      ‘Right-Handed Privilege’ is now an evil thing to be overcome!
      If “Weather” can be “racist” can the Leftists soon be declaring that tornados, hurricanes, volcanoes, and earthquakes as “racist” be far behind? Will White people driving Black cars be considered as racist?
      Could it be the use of Fluoride in the big-city water or ‘preservatives’ in the food causing the Leftist to see everything under the sun as racist? OH, NO! Not the Sun too!
      Thus, proving time and time again, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that Leftism is a Transmissible Mental Disease!
      Please, SPAY and NEUTER your LEFTISTS!
      • However, their “Transgender” movement and the end of Roe v. Wade, is causing Leftist men getting many more vasectomies and Leftist women getting many more tubal ligations, so that they are doing a marvelous job of spaying and neutering themselves already!

      Reply
  4. Theodore

    I’ll be laughing about this little essay all day! Even though it isn’t a real study (as in scientifically done) it does make total sense. It is rather obvious that the typical liberal mental range is less than that of a radish, but the way this was presented makes it so easy to see that most of the mental rejects on the left should be able to see it, even though they will deny it.

    Reply
  5. wyomingman

    That’s what they say “liberal—–someone leaning so far left their brain fell out.” Now we have ‘scientific evidence’ that proves that.

    Reply
    • Sam

      Wyoming state ? Been there. Lovely. Especially Johnson co Kaycee is greater than any major city

      Reply
  6. Mike F

    What a bunch of bullshit here! Any reference for this study? Of course not, these results are laughable (if not so sick). A new low for the windbag post-Ernst has finally hit the bottom…

    Reply
    • Jeff

      Another example of the liberal brain. It can’t see sarcasm when it hits them in the face, because they are always looking to find something that offends them.

      Reply
    • Mike f

      Sounds just like trump-when called out for his BS his usual response was “I was being sarcastic”. But since you and I were not in the room to hear Urnst, nor did he follow it up with lol or haha, and considering the amount of BS that the windbag post puts out-how do you know he was being sarcastic?

      Reply
      • rick

        Mike f, look at the methodology.

        The brains were taken out of the heads of the participating subjects without affecting the function of the brain-owner and the brains in any significant way.

        The article is meant for a laugh, but liberals cannot take a joke. Anyone that is not a liberal knows that liberals have a goofy way of thinking about everything and are not capable of rational thought. It is just the way it is. Don’t be offended and just go back to destroying the world as before, although, I wish you wouldn’t because I have grand kids.

        Reply
      • KawikaFiveSix

        Thus, proving time and time again, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that Leftism is a Transmissible Mental Disease!
        Please, SPAY and NEUTER your LEFTISTS!
        • However, their “Transgender” movement and the end of Roe v. Wade, is causing Leftist men getting many more vasectomies and Leftist women getting many more tubal ligations, so that they are doing a marvelous job of spaying and neutering themselves already!

        Reply
  7. KawikaFiveSix

    Talk about an incomplete study!
    “…randomly selected adult liberals… and BOTH genders were studied over a period…”
    WHAT! You didn’t study all 157 of the Liberal “genders”?
    LOL

    Reply
  8. Joseph S. Bruder

    This is poorly written sarcasm, and an indication of what Republicans and Conservatives think science is all about. Are these the people you want leading our country?

    Reply
    • pineapplefish56

      Yes, Joe Bruder, those stupid, ignorant Republicans think Science is about FACTS when we all know it is about individual feelings!

      Reply

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